Success is a feeling

I just visited for the first time, there for a weekend coach training retreat (shoutout to my Lumia colleagues ).

It was a weekend of firsts. First time seeing the Flatiron mountains. First time I saw a fellow sit by a squirrel, then ask the squirrel if it was after his weed .

First time I was surrounded by dozens of coaches, all like me – wanting to help others and make the world a better place.

I dove into a pool of coaching info. I connected with lovely souls, dissected pervasive topics (hello money mindset, perfectionism and imposter syndrome) and caught snippets of what others were doing to promote their work (one person is posting 5x's a day on IG!).

As the weekend evolved, I couldn’t help but feel a question/curiosity well up.

I started to wonder, "What does it look like to be a successful?"

Does it mean becoming an influencer? Does it mean having dozens of clients? Does it mean working 4 hours a day? Does it mean fame, a six-figure income? Freedom to structure your day however you like?

Then I realized -- those weren't the questions I wanted to ask. And I remembered this quote (though I can’t remember where I saw it).

The question isn’t what success should look like to the world, but what does it feel like in my world?

For me, success means feeling calm, creative, authentic, grounded, loved, impactful. Living with purpose. Inspired by moments. Balanced when you look at the long view. Always learning, always growing.

It does NOT mean a bank balance, number of followers, likes, or clients, or hustling so hard it hurts.

How many times do people chase a goal, thinking they’ll be happy when they get there, and then once they get there, they realize it doesn’t make them as happy as they thought it would?

It can be hard to remember this truth in the moment, when you’re learning about someone else’s successes. When it feels like you should be playing on their fields. That you should WANT to define your wins based on how you measure up against others.

But the more I asked this question of myself, "What does success feel like in my world?" the more I realized the truth of the answers.

My mantra: Success is a feeling that I get to define.

We get to define what makes me feel successful. Success is an inside job. It's ours for the taking, if we mindfully define what success means

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Mother-Daughter Talk Topics - What does boundary-setting sound like?